Personal Development and Self Improvement» actions

I acknowledge that I cannot control others. I can only control myself.

blogadmin — Mon, 13 Jul 2009 12:38:19 +0000

There's only one corner of the universe you can be certain of improving, and that's your own self. - Aldous Huxley

I release the tendency to try to control the thoughts, opinions, or actions of other people and focus, instead, on self-improvement. After all, there is only one person I have power over: myself!

Of course, I like it when people think well of me, but I let go of worrying about what they might think. It’s a waste of my time and energy and causes me undue stress. I know I do my best and that is all I can do. I accept this and am okay with it.

When I live by the Golden Rule – “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you” – and remain true to myself, I am confident most people will think highly of me. If they do not, I refuse to let it bother me, since I cannot control them anyway.

I like knowing that I am in control of my own thoughts, behaviors, and actions. It sure takes the burden off my shoulders to know that the only person I need to control is me. What an uplifting revelation!

I have gratitude to bring me joy.

I have a passion for life that enables me to enjoy every minute of every day by simply living in the moment.

I have affirmations to replace negative thoughts and attitudes with the positive ones I deserve. This tool allows me all the self-improvement I could ever desire.

Armed with my tools and my understanding of how I can shape my world, I go forth confident of success. Today, I choose to live every moment true to myself, not worrying about what others might think.

Self-Reflection Questions:

1. Do I fret over what others think of me?
2. What have my results been like when I’ve tried to control someone else?
3. What tools do I have that enable me to shape my surroundings?

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Being balanced and fulfilled is accomplished by handling things in moderation.

blogadmin — Sat, 04 Jul 2009 14:34:21 +0000

I know when to leave work at work.

I pursue everything in my life with passion; however, I keep myself from overdoing it. I know that too much focus in one area distracts me from other areas. I strive to maintain a balance so I can fulfill my desires in every aspect of my life.

I recognize that keeping everything in moderation brings good consequences. I can control my actions so I can enjoy these positive results every day.

Take eating, for example. I love food! I enjoy trying new foods and savoring the unique flavors. I also know that if I overeat, it interferes with my desires for a healthy, fit body. So I eat in moderation for fulfillment in both areas.

My passion for my work brings me many rewards. But I also recognize that leaving work behind at the end of each workday lets me pursue my passions in my personal life: hobbies, family, and leisure activities. So I work in moderation to allow time for all.

I thoroughly enjoy being with the love of my life! I also realize that saying ‘see you soon’ for part of the day builds anticipation when we meet again. Moderation keeps excitement in our relationship so our time together is even more fulfilling.

My time with my children is joyful. However, we give each other the freedom and support to pursue our own goals with focus and passion, knowing that fulfillment in every area makes our time together a whole lot more fun.

Today, my plan is to schedule time for work, family, and leisure activities, giving equal importance to each. This way I can thoroughly enjoy myself and end the day with a great feeling of accomplishment and fulfillment.

Self-Reflection Questions:

1. Do I leave work behind at the end of my workday?
2. Am I giving equal importance to my leisure time each day?
3. Which area of my life could use more focus so I can regain balance?

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From Where Does Personal Development Begin?

blogadmin — Thu, 02 Jul 2009 13:11:32 +0000

Jacklyn Ker & Stuart Tan

First the heart

Where does personal development begin in a person? It begins first in the heart, then in the mind. It begins with a desire in the heart. My friend Jacklyn Ker was a lupus patient for many years. Her condition had worsened and developed into many complications to a point that she needed dialysis. In her despair, she attempted suicide several times. One day when Jacklyn woke up on the hospital bed, she determined in her heart that she would improve on her attitude. She decided to snap out of her despair. Instead of being a burden on her family, she began supporting herself by becoming a cab driver. Her cheerful and positive attitude eventually caused a miracle to take place in her body. Today she is a healthy person, financially independent and a Jade Ambassador of a network marketing company.

Personal Development is meant to be personal

I used to snuff at personal development, particularly when it was shoved down my throat. How do you like having people come to you and say, “Do this! Follow these seven steps and be a better person. Write down your goals and action plans and show it to me. From now on, you are to commit yourself to achieving these goals.” Everyday at work, your boss set departmental goals. You are asked to set your personal goals and action plans. List down the courses you plan to attend. Clock up a hundred hours worth of courses in a year. At the end of the year, neither you nor your department achieved its goals. Work review is nothing more than a fault finding session and you are threatened to work harder than you should.

Jacklyn Ker

The problem here is that these goals are not mine to begin with. I have absolutely no desire to achieve them. You can dream up any goals, write them down, pin it up on your bedroom walls and stare at them everyday and it is not going to change a thing. If you examine deep down inside yourself, are you serious about it? Do you really want it? Unless you want it, you are not going to achieve it because you are absolutely not going to do anything towards achieving it. Unless you desire it, you are not going to have it.

Then the mind

After you have desired it in your heart, the transformation will next take place in your mind – your thinking. The world’s number one bestseller is the Bible. The number two bestseller is an old book written by a man called Napoleon Hill. The book is entitled “Think and Grow Rich”. Years ago when I read the title, “Think and Grow Rich”, I thought the author meant that I should start imagining that I am rich and then I will become rich. That was why I held a certain cynical attitude towards the book even before I read it because I thought that the idea was silly. But with more understanding today, I have now realized that the word “Think” in the title of the book refers to changing your thinking. A man with a poverty mindset cannot become rich but remain poor. To become rich, you must think differently. Warren Buffet thinks differently from most of the stock market investors. He buys when others sell and sells when others buy.

You cannot change until your thinking change. You do not take action because of your fear of taking risk and you like the comfort of being where you are even if you are feeling miserable. At least it is familiar evil that you are comfortable with. But when your thinking changes, you will begin moving forward and do what you usually would not have. And your future and destiny will also change.

So begin today by looking down in your heart where your desire resides and change a whole new mindset up in your head. Just as what Johnny Wimbrey says, “Are you willing to do today what others don’t to have tomorrow what others won’t.

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I enjoy regular evenings out to help me let go, reflect, and relax.

blogadmin — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 15:24:11 +0000

I let go of exhaustion and allow peace and tranquility into my life.

My life has a healthy balance of work and play. I welcome the chance to get away from my routine. When I receive an invitation to go out, I make the arrangements necessary to free myself.

I participate in a variety of calming activities throughout the week, as well as on the weekend. One of my favorite things to do is to take long walks.

My goal is to seek opportunities to get away from it all and recharge my batteries. My friends look forward to spending time with me. I can let my hair down and laugh out loud until my face hurts.

I know how to have a good time. I make it a habit to enjoy myself by letting go of the weight of my responsibilities.

Even when my spirits are low and I would rather stay home, I push myself to go out. Going out helps to distract my thoughts from the mundane and adds some excitement to my life. I treat myself to nice dinners because I am worthy of being pampered.

Going to the spa helps me release tension. When I indulge myself in massages and warm baths regularly, I send my body a message of love. Pampering my body is the first step I take in caring for myself as a whole.

I am completely free from guilt when I take good care of my body, mind, and spirit.

To ensure that my actions are leading me in the direction of my dreams, I regularly spend private time examining my heart. By leaving my worries behind, I am able to enjoy myself when I go out.

Self-Reflection Questions:

1. How often do I take time for myself?
2. What are some activities that I enjoy doing in the evenings?
3. How would my life benefit from having an evening out?

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I am able to speak my thoughts with kind words.

blogadmin — Wed, 10 Jun 2009 15:15:21 +0000

I am committed to fostering healthy relationships, therefore I speak my thoughts kindly. I value my own thoughts and let go of the idea that anyone else’s thoughts are more valid than my own.

I abandon the childish notion that people should be able to read my mind, and instead use effective words to communicate with others. I am willing to take the first step toward communication and resolution.

I also let go of the idea that I have to be sure I am right about an issue before I speak up about it. It is enough for me to tell someone with whom I have conflict how their words or actions make me feel.

My goal is to open doors of communication, not to prove myself right. I listen to others because I desire mutual understanding and the long-term health and strength of my relationships.

I put on my calm hat when I evaluate sticky situations.

I set aside the desire to retaliate when I am hurt, knowing that nothing good can come of this and any feelings of vindication are short-lived.

Instead, I keep the big picture in mind and speak kindly, aiming only for clear communication and deeper, stronger relationships.

Self-Reflection Questions:

1. Do I value my own thoughts as highly as those of others?
2. Do my words reflect my desire for communication and greater understanding?
3. When I am in conflict with someone, do I strive to be patient?

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